Let’s do what’s right

It is very rare that I get overly political in this column, or bring up issues that are of relevance to the wider community outside of theatre. However, dinner with a few friends on Saturday night has led me to the topic I want to discuss today, and while I am sure not everyone will agree, I think it’s a fair discussion.

It is very rare that I get overly political in this column, or bring up issues that are of relevance to the wider community outside of theatre. However, dinner with a few friends on Saturday night has led me to the topic I want to discuss today, and while I am sure not everyone will agree, I think it’s a fair discussion.

I want to talk about gay marriage.

The relevance to theatre is obvious. I am sure this won’t come as too much of a shock to those reading this column, but yes, the theatre industry has a high percentage of people who are gay. Actors, writers, designers, directors – it is a common theme in the industry both here and overseas.

Now let me make the point that I’m about as straight as they come. I’m from the western suburbs of Sydney and I’m a rugby league loving, beer drinking ‘bloke’ who is very much in love with the girl of his dreams. Somehow, the theatre world makes a regular appearance and has become a special part of my life.

The friends I was dining with on Saturday night were all male, and all gay. Two were together in a relationship, the other a single man. All are actors in the theatre industry, and quite accomplished actors at that. I don’t have to tell anyone in the actual industry that our most talented and artistic performers are gay – but to the rest of you, make a note of it.

Here were three people, all laughing and eating, having a great night. A normal night. And their lives are relatively normal – they go to work, they pay taxes, they live and they learn. And of course, they love. But because their ‘love’ is not deemed conventional, they will never marry. They will be left to commitment ceremonies and questions of why.

And to me, it just doesn’t make sense. Sure, this is something that doesn’t and will never impact on my daily life. But I just don’t get it. I don’t get it that in the year 2009, we haven’t woken up yet.

Are we still completely ignorant? Or have we moved on, but politicians are too scared that a move towards gay marriage could be an election issue they don’t want to face.

If Kevin Rudd was to turn around tomorrow and put the wheels in motion for the legalisation of gay marriage, how would it affect your life? If you’re a straight person, how would it change things?

We watch as the ‘conventional’ marriage breaks up around us. We watch as the definition of the ‘conventional’ marriage is often tinged by abuse and divorce.

Over the years, society has moved with the times. We’ve watched skirts get shorter, and accepted it. We’ve seen divorce rates soar, and seemingly accepted it. We’ve seen kids born out of marriage, sometimes from one night stands, and while we sometimes shake our heads, we have accepted it. But not gay marriage. That’s still in the ‘too hard’ basket.

It will be a brave Labor or Liberal leader who walks out to the waiting media, and declares that his party supports gay marriage. One day, however, it will happen. Unfortunately, me and the friends I dined with on Saturday night – and the countless others I have become friends with in the theatre industry – may never get to see it.

No, I’m no gay. Have never given it a thought, and sure like plenty of other typical Aussie blokes, I don’t get it. But what I do get is that the gay friends I have are some of the most caring, compassionate, talented and strong-willed people that I know.

Let’s wake up to ourselves and look at ways to make a difference.

There is a good chance the journey starts here: http://www.australianmarriageequality.com/.